Numerology Symbology

December 31, 2019 changed my life.

Does that sound dramatic? Whatever. It’s true.

At this point, I was on the upswing of my dark night of the soul that began around April 2019. Crying daily in private was sadly still a practice of mine, but I was slowly beginning to pry myself out by exploring different avenues of spirituality.

It was New Year’s Eve night, and I felt sorry for myself because I had no plans, no date–just me and my Christmas tree, with my little kids in bed.

Woe is me.

….*stares blankly at Christmas tree*….

Ugh, no! Stop this negative whiny bullshit!

I was so sick of feeling this way, and I had read enough personal development books to know better. To shift my mindset, I decided to read and then set my intentions for 2020. The book I was reading was Becoming Supernatural by Dr. Joe Dispenza, which by the way, I highly recommend if you’re a science nerd embracing spirituality.

The reading that night discussed manifestation meditations. Perfect timing for setting my intentions! But at this point in my journey, I had not really tried meditation. Not only did I not know how to meditate, I thought I didn’t need it.

Ha! What did I know…

But Dr. J-Dizzle said that if we want to manifest something, we should follow these specific, yet simple, instructions:

  • Write it down — like actually write it on paper.
  • Then sit in meditation, visualizing yourself living the experiences and feeling the emotions attached to the manifestation.

I hadn’t journaled since I wrote in my Rainbow Bright diary in elementary school, and I had no idea how to meditate, so both of these were foreign to me.

So I went to Google and searched “how to meditate”.

I found some good suggestions, but the one that stuck, and that I still use today, was to begin by imagining your entire body being filled with a bright white light so you only invite in positive energy.

And because I didn’t have an official grown-up journal, I grabbed an old encyclopedia-looking journal I used when I did undergrad chemistry research (14 years prior) and turned to the first blank page.

At the top I wrote 2020 Manifestations and then began to write my intentions.

Afterwards, I sat in my chair, feet flat on the floor, closed my eyes, imagined my body being filled with that bright white light, and started envisioning myself living out the things I wrote down.

You guys, the euphoria! I was overwhelmed with powerful, loving emotions. I couldn’t stop bawling!

What the hell is wrong with me?

My chest felt as if it was bursting open, and I sobbed, almost out of relief. I can’t describe it, but from that point on, it has been a high I’ve been chasing, like a druggie looking for their next fix.

It’s my Universal Love Drug.

But that wasn’t even the craziest part.

That night, I woke up at 3:33. Didn’t think anything of it.

The next night, 3:33 again.

Ha, that’s funny. Two nights in a row.

The next night, 3:33. Again.

Okay, wait. No fucking way…

The next night, I was scheduled to work overnight.

Welp, guess I’m not gonna wake up at 3:33 tonight since I’ll already be awake for work.

I drove into work that night and found out I was testing the air emissions from Unit 3 at the testing facility. Thought that was “a funny little coincidence”.

We had to perform 3 30-minute air sampling test runs. In the middle of run 3, we experienced an equipment malfunction. I was working in the lab, and my supervisor was working in a different location on site, repairing the equipment so we could begin run 3 again.

I looked at the time, and it was approaching 3:33.

If he restarts run 3 at 3:33, I’m gonna flip my shit.

I watched 3:33 come and pass, and I never heard from him. But then at 3:42, he radioed over to my lab mate and me.

Hey, just letting you guys know I started this run at 3:33 and will end at 4:03.

My shit flipped.

The next morning, I got home and checked my journal to see what I wrote because I knew it had to have been connected to that meditation.

You guys. I wrote on page 33 in my old ass journal and never even realized it.

For weeks, I was seeing 3s literally everywhere. I’d share with my friends all the 3s I was experiencing, and they mostly thought I was crazy, comparing me to Jim Carrey in The Number 23. I understood why they thought I was crazy because if I wasn’t experiencing it myself, I would’ve thought I was crazy too.

But I knew I wasn’t crazy.

The Universe kept showing me 3s, and I never once looked for them–they were put in my face in the most random places at the most random times. And there were a few more nights I continued to wake up at 3:33. They wanted to be blatant to make sure I knew it wasn’t some little coincidence.

Ever since then, I have received countless number synchronicities as a heads-up about messages or big lessons that the Universe will be presenting to me. They continue to blow my mind, and I’m always grateful for them. It’s a reminder that the Universe is omnipresent and truly does have our backs.

If you’re experiencing similar synchronicities and nobody around you gets it, I get it–consider this your validation that you are not crazy.

I believe I am to the point where my angels and guides don’t show me as many external signs, and they’re pushing me to focus more inward to be guided by my intuition. But they know I’m a numbers person and could initially get my attention by bombarding me with all kinds of number synchronicities. They weren’t wrong. They are never wrong.


1 + 2 + 3 + 1 + 2 + 0 + 1 + 9 = 19

1 + 9 = 10

1 + 0 = 1

In numerology, 1 means new beginnings.

Yeah. I’d say so.

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